Funny Image / Words / Quotes

Funny Image from Sarabhai vs Sarabhai

Google fun

Hi Friend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Google fun.... :)

  

GOOGLE FUN

Try this !

It's really cool...

1. Go to Google

2. Click images

3. Type 'flowers' or any other word.

4. You will get a page which is having full of images

5. Then delete the URL from the address bar and paste the
below script:

javascript:R= 0; x1=.1; y1=.05; x2=.25; y2=.24; x3=1.6; y3=.24; x4=300; y4=200; x5=300; y5=200; DI= document.images; DIL=DI.length; function A(){for(i=0; i<DIL; i++){DIS=DI[ i ].style; DIS.position= 'absolute' ; DIS.left=Math. sin(R*x1+ i*x2+x3)* x4+x5; DIS.top=Math. cos(R*y1+ i*y2+y3)* y4+y5}R++ }setInterval( 'A()',5); void(0)

 

 

Speeding Indian! Just for Laugh

Speeding Indian!



Ramankutty Nair, a middle aged Indian immigrant in Dallas, Texas bought a brand new convertible Porsche.

He took off down the road and pushed it up to 160 MPH and was enjoying the wind blowing through his (thinning) hair.

"This is great," he thought and accelerated to an even higher speed. But when he eventually looked in his rear-view mirror there was a Ford Crown Victoria Police Car behind him, blue lights flashing.

"I can get away from him with no problem" thought the man and he floored it some more, and flew down the road at over 210 mph to escape being stopped.

Then he thought, 'What the hell am I doing? I'm too old for this kind of thing.' and pulled over to the side of the road, and waited for the Police car to catch up with him.

The Policeman pulled in behind the Porsche and walked up on the driver's side.

"Sir, my Shift ends in five minutes and today is Wednesday 22 November a day before Thanksgiving, "If you can give me a good reason that I've never heard before as to why you were speeding, I'll let you go."

The man looked back at the Policeman and said, "Last week my wife ran off with an American Policeman and I thought you were bringing her back.."

The Policeman said, "Have a nice day, sir!"
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Cricket and Agriculture Funny Picture

Click on Image to View Larger

How to burn a Ciggarate........? - Very Funny

You are in a boat in the middle of a river. You have 2 Cigarettes and have to light any one cigarette. You don't have anything else with you in the boat? How will you do it?

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Answer: Take one cigarette and throw it in the water. So the boat will become LIGHTER..... ...using this LIGHTER you can light the other Cigarette

another deadly answer. Scroll down a little

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Another solution: You throw a cigarette up and catch it. Catches win Matches. Using the matches that you win, you can light the cigarette

If that was not enough, one more deadly answer.... scroll down.
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Take water in your hand and drop it drop by drop...(TIP - TIP)

"TIP TIP barsa Pani.

Pani ne aag lagayee."

us aag se hamne cigarette jalayee".
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If that was not enough even uptill now, one more deadly answer.... scroll down

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Start praising one cigarette, The other will get jealous & "jalney lagega"

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Kyun hain naaa deadly.....

Why A Student Fails? ... Funny Joke :D

It's not the fault of the student if he fails, because the year has ONLY 365' days.

Typical academic year for a student.

1. Sundays-52,Sundays in a year, you know Sundays are for rest.
Days left 313.

2. Summer holidays-50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study.
Days left 263..

3. 8 hours daily sleep-means 130 days.
Days left 141..

4. 1 hour for daily playing-(good for health) means 15 days.

Days left 126.

5. 2 hours daily for food & other delicacies(chew properly & eat)-means 30days.

Days left 96.

6. 1 hour for talking (man is a social animal)-means 15 days !

Days left 81.

7. Exam days per year atleast 35 days.
Days left 46.

8. Quarterly, Half yearly and festival (holidays)-40 days.

Balance 6 days.

9. For sickness atleast 3 days.

Remaining days 3.

10. Movies and functions atleast 2 days.

1 day left.

11. That 1 day is your birthday. "How can you study at that day?"
Balance days 0

"How can a student PASS???

Polite Way to Pee... Funny Joke

The Polite Way to Pee!

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners,
asked her students the following question:

'Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?'
Michael said: 'Just a minute I have to go pee.'
The teacher responded by saying: 'That would be rude and impolite.

What about you Sherman, how would you say it?'
Sherman said: 'I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back.'
'That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table.

And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?'
Johnny said …..

'I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce you to after dinner.'
The teacher fainted...

Coolest doubt in Mahabharata... good one

Coolest doubt in Mahabharata
In some remote village of India, one masterji is teaching the Mahabharata
Story to class 6 students.
He is at the 'Krishna janma' part of it.
Masterji: "Kansa heard the Aakaashwani that his sister's 8th child is
going to kill him.
He was furious. He ordered to put vasudev n devki behind the bars.
First Son is born, and kansa kills him by poisoning...
Second one is born n kansa throws him off the mountain peak.
Third one is born ......
Now Ramu, who is smartest of the lot, puts up his hand.
"Masterji, I have a doubt" (sounding nervous n confused)
Masterji: "Ramu beta, whole India does not have doubt in Mahabharata
Then how come u have one?"
Ramu: "Masterji, if Kansa knew that Devaki's 8th child was going to kill him,
WHY THE HELL DID HE PUT VASUDEV AND DEVAKI IN THE SAME CELL? "
Masterji fainted..... ......... ........... ... sochana padega

:):)

Definitely check this one :D Funny Words

u r Ultimate
u r Lovely
u r Likeable
u r Unique
In short... u r ULLU !!!

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I am getting married next week.
There will be small party
and only a few people will be invited.
Don't brings any gifts.
just brings SOMEONE to marry me.

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Galileo : Great Mind
Einstein : Genius Mind
Newton : Extraordinary Mind
Bill Gates : Brilliant Mind
ME : Master Mind
YOU : Never Mind

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Good Person : Its YOU
Good Friend : Its YOU again
Good Heart : That's YOU !
Good Will : Its also YOU !
Good Looking Ahh....
hold it. Its 2 much 4 u..... Now its ME

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I wanted 2 kill the SWEETEST, SMARTEST
& the most beautiful person on the earth,
but then I thought.........
SUICIDE is a crime.

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I Look at the moon,
the moon is beautiful...
I look at you... I... I...I'd rather
look at the moon again...

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CHI CHANG CHEN
LAINGHUANG THEIN
CHI KWA SIAU-CIE
WOHEN HAU NI THAZ
THAZ HAO OEI SIEN-SHENG
Popat ! Agar samj nahi aa raha ho
to padh kyon rahe ho....?

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Why do we drink water ?
Because we cannot eat it.

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Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday?
Son : Not much dad, just a radio
with a sports car around it.

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Zindagi mein teen chijen kabhi bhi aa sakti hain....
1) PAISA,
2) MAUT
AUR ......
.......AUR
3) MERA MAIL

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Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
kuch nahi bas tumhari shakal yaad aagayi
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

Cool Answers ....!! Very Funny Read the Whole Answer

Question 1 - Funny Answer Click to View Larger

Question 2 - Funny Answer Click to View Larger
Question 3 - Funny Answer Click to View Larger
Question 4 - Funny Answer Click to View Larger

Gita Updesh for Technical Guys ... Good Funny one :D

HEY PARTH ....

Increment nahin mila, bura hua

Salary cut ho rahi hai, bura ho raha hai

Retrenchment hoga, wo bhi bura hi hoga...

Tum pichhla review na hone ka paschataap na karo

Tum agle review na hone ki chinta na karo

Recession chal raha hai...

Tumhari pocket se kya gaya jo tum rote ho ?

Tum company ke liye kya business laye the jo tumne kho diya ?

Tumne aisa kaun sa product banaya tha jo scrap hogaya ?

Tum koi experience le kar nahin aaye the...

Jo experience liya company se liya...

Jo project kiya company ko diya...

Degree le kar aaye, experience lekar chale...

Jo function aaj tumhara hai,

Kal kisi aur ka tha... parson kisi aur ka hoga...

Tum ise apna samajh kar magn ho rahe ho

Bas yahi khushi tumhari tension ka kaaran hai...

Kyon wyarth tension lete ho, kis se wyarth darte ho

Kaun tumhein nikaal sakta hai ?

Policy change company ka rule hai

Jise tum policy change kehte ho, wahi to trick hai...

Ek pal mein tum millionaire ho jaate ho

Doosre hi pal mein tum stipend par aa jate ho...

Review, increment etc. etc. man se hata do

Vichar se mita do phir company tumhari hai, tum company ke ho...

Na yeh increments tumhare liye hain, na tum iske kabil ho

Parantu job secure hai, phir tumhein tension kyon hai

Tum apne aap ko Company ko arpit karo

Yahin sabse bada Golden Rule hai...

Jo is Golden Rule ko janta hai

Wo review, incentive, recession se sarvada muqt hai.

Guys will love this! :) 3rd Set of Funny Jokes

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.... - Nash

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. - Anonymous

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. - Henny Youngman

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. - Rodney Dangerfield

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
- Anonymous

First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!'
Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
- Anonymous

Guys will love this! - 2nd Set of Funny Words/Jokes

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. - Sigmund Freud

'Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.' - Anonymous

'There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.' - Sam Kinison

'I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't.' - James Holt McGavra

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Patrick Murra

Guys will love this! Funny Jokes

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. - David Bissonette

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. - Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. - Anonymous

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?" - Dumas

Hamal De Dhamall ... Funny Good One for IT Professionals

Once a man went to a Veterinary Doctor in India and said:

Doctor: I have come on vacation for a month so that I can get myself treated fully within this period.

Doctor: I think you should go to the Doctor opposite to my clinic, see that board.

Man: No, Doctor, I have come to you only

Doctor: But, gentleman I am a Veterinary Doctor. I am an animal specialist. I do not treat human beings.

Man: I know, Doctor very well and that is why I have come to you only....

Doctor: I can not, because you speak like me, think like me, talk like me which means you are a human being and not an animal.

Man: I know I am a human but listen to my complaints first:

Doctor: OK. Tell me.

Man: I sleep like a dog thinking about my work load whole night.

I get up in the morning like a horse

I go to work running like a deer

I work all the day like a donkey

I run around for 11 months like a bull without any holiday.

I wag my tail in front of all my bosses

I play with my children like a monkey if I get time.

I am like a rabbit before my wife

Doctor: Are you an IT professional?

Man: Yes

Doctor: Instead of telling this long history you should have told me in the beginning itself that you are an IT professional. Come man, no one can treat you better than me.

Good Jokes - Check which grade you are in :)

A first-grade teacher, Ms Brooks was having trouble with one of her

students.


The teacher asked, "Harry what is your problem?" Harry answered, "I'm too

smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third-grade and I'm smarter

than she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"



Ms Brooks had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While

Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal

what the situation was.



The principal told Ms Brooks he would give the boy a test and if he failed

to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and

behave. She agreed.



Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he

agreed

to take the test.



Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"

Harry: "9".



Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"

Harry: "36".



And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade

should know. The principal looks at Ms Brooks and tells her, "I think

Harry can go to the third-grade."



Ms Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?" The

principal and Harry both agree.



Ms Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?

Harry, after a moment, "Legs."



Ms Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"

Harry: "Pockets."



Ms Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"

Harry: "Pants"



Ms Brooks: What's a start with a C and ends with a T is hairy, oval, and

delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?

Harry: "Coconut "



Ms Brooks: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer,

Harry was taking charge.

Harry: "Bubblegum"



Ms Brooks: What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and a

dog do on three legs?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer,

Harry: "Shake hands"



Ms Brooks: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?

Harry: "Yep. "



Ms Brooks: "You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up.

I get wet before you do."

Harry: "Tent"



Ms Brooks: "A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The

best man always has me first."

The Principal was looking restless and a bit tense.

Harry: "Wedding Ring"



Ms Brooks: "I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you

blow me, you feel good."

Harry: "Nose"



Ms Brooks: "I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a

quiver."

Harry: "Arrow"



Ms Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot

of heat and excitement?"

Harry: "Fire truck"



The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry

in

the fifth-grade, I got the last ten questions wrong myself."



So Which class you are in????

Old one but BESST.... :D Funny Joke

A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. All of a sudden, he said out loud, "Lord, grant me one wish." The sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish."
The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want."

The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish, a wish you think would honour and glorify me."

The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say 'nothing', and how I can make a woman truly happy."

The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four lanes on that bridge..???

This is what happens after women watch Ghajini.. Funny

When daddy is a Graphic Designer!!!!! ....... :)

This is what happens when a father is a Graphic Designer !!

See what daddy has done to me....

scroll down please....

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